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Happiness: As Good As It Gets

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Recently a friend sent me an email asking me my secret to happiness. It took me by surprise as I didn't have an answer. I can remember a time in my life when my moods would swing, I had depression, but I was treated and do not live with that now. But happy? I wouldn't exactly call it that.

The truth is, I had to think about it. Growing up, I was known as morose, sad, and moody. What was this "happiness" thing. To be honest, I thought Rowan And Martin were onto something when they sarcastically said, "May the bluebird of happiness fly up your nose".

As in Kafka's memorable opening line in Anna Karinina "All happy families are alike. Each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way". We had our own way of being unhappy. And if someone tried to change that status quo it was considered "making waves". Victim mentality was a good thing. People felt sympathy. It was also a very unhealthy thing, fueled with a good bit of dysfunction. But I feel grateful to have experienced it and moved on, learned from it, and possibly won't repeat it.

Happiness, to me, if there is such a thing, is really getting down to basics. By basics I mean go as far back as The U.S. Constitution "...and the pursuit of happiness" which is actually written by these stern men with no smiles, at least not in their renderings, but they knew the importance of it.

Shakespeare, like many writers, instinctively knew how important it was to be true to oneself. He coined the phrase "To thine own self be true". He didn't say that just to show off. He was providing years of therapy into one sentence. If one is true to oneself, the amount of money, fame, or any other trappings don't mean a thing.

Given these facts, let's count how many ways we compromise our happiness, or make certain it does not happen. We take jobs which are terrible but pay well. We do not like our co-workers and they do not like us. We do not like our boss and he does not like us either. We get married and have kids out of peer pressure. All our friends and associates did it, but we were not ready, or the opposite. We decided not to get married as we grew up in an unhappy home, and we would "show our parents with sweet revenge" (That was my modus operandi for many years). Suddenly it occurred to me they didn't care what I did as long as I was in the pursuit of happiness. Besides, they were deceased. Or we go past our credit card limit paying astronomical interest for years to come, just to impress someone who never really cared in the first place. We forgot, what happiness we do get, generally comes from within.

I learned that thought the book was great, never to take "Everything I Ever Needed To Know I Learned In Kindergarten" too literally. Yes, it offered some pragmatic lessons and great analogies, but the most powerful lessons I have learned, to transcend from sadness and depression, have been mistakes made in adulthood. I make less of them now, but I still make them. I don't get all upset when I do. I realize there is a lesson about to be learned.

I try to think of the great DeNiro line (to his psychiatrist Billy Crystal) in the movie "Analyze That". "It's a process, doc". Of course out of context it is not funny, but in the movie it's a scream. And life and happiness, getting more of both, is, indeed a process, and can be a painful one at that. But the risks are worth the rewards.

Simple is good. Complex is not so good. It is human nature to like drama. Leave it for the movies. Live your life more simply and experience more happiness. It is really that simple. Sounds cliche but I can guarantee you, in my half-century here on earth, I have an inkling of wisdom in that area.

Don't quit your day job, but learn new subjects. Start a hobby. It might turn into a business one day. You never know. That is what happened to me. I started creating cartoons as a hobby, never thinking in a million years it would be more than a hobby. Ten years later it is the largest offbeat cartoon website on the Internet, Londons Times Cartoons with ten niche and superstore gift shops, and over 100,000 funny gifts and collectibles bearing our cartoon images. It was only because I was true to myself. I no longer have or want my day job, thank you very much.

Working in the field of humor, comedy, or cartooning is not the answer necessarily. It may be if that is what you desire. Whatever field you choose, expose yourself to it. It has been proven that it becomes a part of us. Before you know it, if you've watched enough comedy films, seen enough funny Internet or newspaper cartoons, read enough jokes, etc., you find your mind thinking in funnier ways. It really has that effect.

Dr. Bernie Siegel who wrote a best-seller in the 1980's, Love, Laughter, And Healing helped me a great deal when my mother was dying of cancer. I called him. He claims in his book that he had incurable brain cancer and exposed himself to many comedy movies, videos, cartoons, and sitcoms. He had no idea if it would help heal him, he just felt his mortality and wanted to laugh a bit. Within a few years, his brain cancer was in remission and he still is alive and writing two decades later. I have discussed this with him on several occasions and he offered up some of the greatest advice I ever had, expose your mom to humor. I went to the video store daily and found a different comedy film every day and we watched it together. It also brought me closer to my mom. She lived about four years longer than they expected.

Dr. Seigel's advice became paramount in my life and still is. It had a monumental effect on me. The only other such event was a Gary Larson Far Side exhibit at the Smithsonian in the mid-1980's. I saw just how important humor and cartooning really is in our culture. I never knew it at the time, that I would enter the world of cartooning, but my fans and friends insist it has a calming and healing effect. That adds to my happiness.

Sharing a joke, a funny book or story, or even a cartoon gift with someone is something that will cheer them up. It has a synergistic effect and will do the same for you. I have tried it many times and it's a sure-fire remedy for what ails you. I am not saying not to listen to professional medical advice, just saying it is a great way to add to one's happiness, hence your own.

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The Internet's most popular offbeat cartoon is Londons Times www.londonstimes.us by Rick London. He also has numerous cartoon funny gift shops which he feels help spread happiness One cartoon gift item store is Top Cartoonist Rick London Shares Ways To Become Happier



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